Willistown United Methodist Church, you suck. Terrible, hypocritical, hell-worthy: these are all adjectives that I thought described you. My blog probably gets more traffic than your crap-ball website. I hope that when people google "willistown united methodist church" that my blog comes up first. That way, people can come here and find out what you're really about: sucking.

Let me explain... a few days ago, I was on my 60-mile round trip bike commute to Upenn, riding down West Chester Pike (route 3), when I blew out a tire. Oh, and it was Sunday.

This happened right in front of your church, so I stopped directly in the middle of the driveway to your parking lot. Cars were coming in out and of your parking lot. Perhaps service was just letting out? It was about 11am, Sunday morning, so there was a good crowd there.

So, let's picture this: me, blown out back tire, stranded, trying my best to patch up the huge cut in the rubber, sweating, alone, in need of help.

Not one car of your church members offered to help me out. ZERO. Nobody rolled down the window and said, "Are you ok?" Nobody even waved, or made eye-contact. You just kept driving. Church members, with a guy in need sitting right in front of their church, don't even offer to help. Way to go, bastards. You must have had some pretty tasty brunches that you needed to get to.

This is Willistown United Methodist Church, in case I didn't mention it (I know I did). Here's a google map in case you want to go hang out with these guys:

View Larger Map

So, basically I hope you rot in hell. I left my destroyed tire, tube, and used CO2 cartridge out front, right where I was stranded. Maybe next time you see someone who needs help, you can at least make eye contact with them.


hnb said... @ October 6, 2010 at 6:06 PM

I'm sorry you felt ignored. As Christians, we don't always do what's right or delve from our schedule as we should (being late for brunch).

darcykaat said... @ October 7, 2010 at 11:58 AM

Where have all the Christians gone? God help us.

Bill said... @ October 27, 2010 at 12:36 PM

I am a trainer/coach for soccer goaltenders (youth through NCAA) and occasional cyclist. I also just began a position as the Director of Worship for the band during the casual 9:15 am Sunday service at Willistown UMC.
In short, in my 30+ years working in numerous churches I can say with confidence that, unfortunately, Christians can suck just like anyone else. However,
when we ignore or mistreat someone,
our wearing of the mantle of "Christian" magnifies the offense in everyone's eyes ( as, perhaps, it should).

I've shared this with my pastor
(also a cyclist). Among her first thoughts were how she can present this to the most people with the greatest impact at the church.

Thanks for the wake-up call.

As well, congratulations on approaching 10,000 miles for the year! I'm glad you've been healthy for the entirety of the 2010, for a change.

Jane said... @ October 31, 2010 at 3:53 PM

I, too, am sorry. I am a member of Willistown UMC. At today's Sunday service, our pastor read us your blog and placed your tire and tube on the altar to remind us of our shame.

mapsetahi said... @ November 5, 2010 at 10:58 PM

You commute 60 miles a day and are on track for 10,000 miles for the year. I think you're capable of handling this problem on your own. It's no one else's responsibility to help you out! You should at least have a cell phone and some money with you, if worse comes to worst. And if there were so many churchgoers pulling in and out of the lot, I'm sure you could've walked approached one of them as they were getting or out of their car, and asked for help if you really needed it. Most of them probably just saw a cyclist fixing a flat and went about their business. It's really not a two-person operation. I doubt they looked closely enough to see that your tube itself had blown out - and even if they had, what did you want them to do? Give you and your bike a ride home?

In conclusion, shame on you for a) thinking you were automatically owed help - without having to ask, even, and b) leaving your trash for someone else to pick up, just because because no one stopped to rescue the whiny entitled kid.

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